Sat, Aug 3, 2019

Read in 6 minutes

It would be so improper to jump into this mushy piece without giving Ceasar his due. I apologize for ghosting on you, It was not intentional. I mean, how could it be? The most beautiful thing about me is my mind, and the only way you get to know what's going on there is when I craft articles. So, I sincerely beg your pardon. I wasn't just away for hot-boy summer, I started a very time-demanding job and also quit (For a great reason, which you would all know soon enough), I had the annoying mood swings also, so I had to crawl my way back to my happy place which is in your arms :)


I came across an interesting read by Ivy Miller “here”, permit me to do a quick recap. It addresses our idea of ownership.

Imagine your mom lays claim to your computer, though you bought it with your pepper (money :)). She says just because you live within the confines of her walls and roof, she owns everything you own. She then walks to a jewelry store, picks an expensive necklace and puts it in her purse. She says since it’s in her purse it’s hers’. The shop owner disagrees, your mom is in his own store therefore, the purse and everything in and on your mom are also his. He insists your mom give up her clothes, your mom refuses, so he calls the police. The police come over, only that now, they also belong to the shop owner and thus modern slavery exists with a different face. The jeweler is set to leave for the night and must protect his property, he locks up the store with your mom and the police in it. On his way home, he branches the grocery store to get some veggies, but also now belongs to the grocer. Some Jeff-Bezos kinda guy (a billionaire) puts a dome over the city you all live in and therefore the whole city, buildings and occupants become his. Everyone starts taking every and anything to make their own property. Since the city’s defenses are down, a foreign army invades, they win the war, but knowing they came to our city first, DO WE BELONG TO THEM, OR DO THEY TO US?

Humans house a million and more emotions that cannot be explained, and the above analogy holds true even though we rarely notice it. You come into a house and suddenly it begins to feel like you’re possessed by the owner of that house. Your will is suddenly enveloped just like the smoke of the Lord covered mount Sinai completely. I was reading “born a crime” by Trevor Noah and he pointed out something of worth “_you do not own those you love_”. I personally believe that possessing the ability to let people come into your life as well as letting them leave when it’s time would bring you more far more placidity than you could imagine.

**I believe we are all drivers, passengers come into our rides; which are our hearts every now and then and no matter how pretty or amazingly interesting, down-to-earth straight forward, Godly, Godless and your idea of perfect these people are, they have their destinations, where they must** alight. Imagine a driver refusing to let you out of her car because you are so witty. Soon you’ll watch the fire that once glowed within you from joy of endearment turn in that which eventuari burns up everything you’ve ever worked for your entire life, because_ “when you’re careless with other people, you bring ruin upon your yourself”_. Believe it or not, you do not have the capacity to keep all who come into your life as a friend or life partner and you have to come to the knowledge that it is perfectly normal.


Jesus said “Of all that was given to me, I lost none except the son of perdition: Judas” Don’t occupy yourself with junk books that push you into losing yourself trying so hard to satisfy others while you bring both ruin to yourself and them in the frail end. I must state that people come into your lives at different times for as different a reason from the other as Barcelona differs from Manchester. You never brought them and existed perfectly well before they came, so why do you run yourself ragged because they decided to leave. I totally understand the pain of someone feeling you’re not good enough and jumping ship but really you would be fine even as hard as that is to believe, the statement holds true; _Time heals all wounds. _

I genuinely believed I had things messed up when people decided to just up and go away from my life after a while, and this still haunts me but definitely not like before; this piece is as much to me a message as it is to you. At a time my house was so small, I live in a self-contain apartment somewhere in Port-Harcourt, Nigeria. That house could not fit twenty people comfortably for an hour, and once you begin to see your heart as a home, you know how to care for it, guard it and ultimately you wouldn’t break it. People would leave not because you’re terrible (of course if you are being sincere, you know if you’re a terrible person, and you have to change) or perfect but because they have some place else to be themselves. It’s like the part of the walking dead where Abraham had to part ways with rick Grimes for the sake of saving the world,not because Rick was exactly terrible. You get the logic yeah? :)

Everything is definitely not about you: — people are living their lives perfectly fine without you and I in it, some people born on the same day with you in some region beside Zanzibar and doing great. People leave your life because their own life is about them, their choices, their own consequences, others decide to stay and never leave not because you magically attained perfection. This is the beauty of every waking morning, keeping your fingers crossed, because even the next road safety officer you see may be your own life partner and some little infraction may be what sets that in motion. In the end, you just never know, who would stay and who would go.

In conclusion; Our general idea of Ownership is irrational and utterly farcical. Let’s revert back to saner, much more civilized ways of thoughts. My little self-contain hosting fifty people for forty days would do one thing eventually; KILL US ALL. The grocer shouldn’t hold the jeweler, the jeweler shouldn’t also hold the rich mom, neither should she hold her son. Let us freely give those who have been a beacon to us back to the world which gave them to us for the brief time it was worth it. The rest of the world deserves some of the beautiful people who have come into our lives, and deserves them, unbroken. Dare to give back, because you do not own those you love.


** ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED ON** owoniyiadedoyin.com